Since we’re all friends here, let’s share something naughty we’ve tried in the bedroom (or back of a pick-up truck for those of you into vehicular sex) that we thought would be fun/exciting (or we did because our partner is just sooooo fucking cute and made puppy dog eyes and a sad face when we blanched at the idea) but which turned out to be either not so much fun or just plain horrible.
And because I’m such a good sport, I’ll give you two: whipped cream (trust me — the fantasy is waaaay better than the actual act) and shrimping (and that is ALL I am saying on the latter).
Okay — your turn…
There is something seriously wrong with me because I knew I shouldn’t look up shrimping and yet I did it anyway.
*GAG*
(the first definition I saw said that it was sucking on toes, and I think that is grody. I had NO idea.)
By: Jennelou on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 5:54 am
my naughty story is cinammon motion lotion. Note to self—next time read the label (for external use only).
By: catrina on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 6:50 am
In a similar vein… I had that KY warming, and thought that would be fucking hot to use as lube. Well, it WAS fucking hot– my hole was ON FIRE!
Not fun.
By: cb on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 7:53 am
I had to look up shrimping… I’m not going to ask if your shrimping involved toes or the other definition.
Sorry, I don’t have any tawdry sex tales to share.
By: Mike on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 9:45 am
I wondered why our Dirk was fishing for shrimp so far from the ocean. So what is Crabbing? I’m so Naive I thought the boy next door had caught a snake and I wondered why his mom let him keep it in his room. Then I was only 12. Nowadays if a guy asks to show me his snake I’ll bring my knee pads.
By: Ed on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 9:49 am
Well, double penetration always seemed like a fun thing to do. Now let me explain please…the only two holes I have are a couple of feet apart and I’d have to have been with two guys and……..well that’s not what I meant.
So I thought I’d order one of those double headed, vibrating, glow in the dark and whistle Yankee Doodle Dandy double headed dildos. No, I didn’t check the dimensions, Yes in retrospect I should have because I would have saved 50 bucks. I knew it was going to be trouble when it took 2 D batteries!!!! And there it sits in my bag o’ tricks…all revved up and nowhere to go…that it’ll fit in, anyway.
Any takers???
By: Carl on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 10:33 am
I’ll second you on the whipped cream being better in theory. After that, I got nothin’ to add.
Shrimping?!?! wtf is up with that?
And were you the shrimper or shrimpee? Nevermind…I don’t want to know.
By: kw on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 3:23 pm
Anything with food during sex is a lot like Communism, it works in theory. As for shrimping, no sir, I don’t like it. The person might as well as me to shit on them. EWWWw
By: sorted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 4:42 pm
Frosting works well in place of whipped cream but can put you in a diabetic coma if you use a lot of it.
By: Summer on Tuesday, October 21, 2008
at 6:31 pm
There was this one time with the yellow. It was not a boner maker for me, more like a boner breaker.
By: tornwordo on Wednesday, October 22, 2008
at 5:30 am
Unfortunately I looked up shrimping a few months ago, so it’s too late for me to be ignorant. I try REALLY HARD not to think about it because it makes me gag worse than trying to deep throat. eeewwwww
Funny, in a way, something we tried many years ago didn’t work then, but works really well now. I had to get to know the gay boys to find out how to do it right.
By: javabear on Wednesday, October 22, 2008
at 9:55 am
omg. Now I know what shrimping means. Ugh.
Josh
By: confessionsofaclosetcase on Thursday, October 23, 2008
at 12:05 am
My god! How can so many people be ignorant of the term “shrimping”??
Next people will be saying that they don’t know what a “Cleveland Steamer” is!
By: cb on Thursday, October 23, 2008
at 2:49 pm
I dunno, hooking up with the cousin of a friend on the friend’s bed while he wasn’t at home–was probably my worst act of indiscretion.
By: Josh on Saturday, October 25, 2008
at 8:51 am