Text received at 7:22am this morning:
R u still living around here?
Yep — Coffee Guy. He must’ve hit his new billing cycle and had text messages to burn again.
I did not respond.
34 minutes later, another text came my way:
Call me. Looking fward to catching up. 
Call me? He has my number, yet feels incapable of dialing it. And obviously his fingers aren’t painted on because the man has mad texting skillz. Plus, what’s with the “catching up” bullshit? It hasn’t been a priority for nearly 2 months, why now? I’m not even going to try and decipher the wink after the “catching up”…
Jesus Christ — men are so stupid and frustrating. And that includes myself, because I am actually thinking about giving him a call.
And if by some rare chance things should culminate in us getting together to catch up over dinner, I have no intention of sucking his purple helmeted snot Nazi for dessert.
No matter how much I want to.
“purple helmeted snot Nazi”
Roberta! Cancel my 3:00 fellatio!
How much DO you want to? The reason I ask is, perhaps it’s time to see how much HE wants you to. Try this text:
Pt up or sht up.
By: Aaron on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 12:46 pm
Please don’t agree to Greek food again. His wanting to get together to talk about old times reminds me of SNL having one of their famous best of the season compilation shows after only haviing three of them altogether. I’d txt hm back and say, Call me we DO have so much to discuss it will be just like old times! I think there are worse things to have for desert, but remember don’t let him do all the poking!
By: Ed on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 1:13 pm
Text messaging is technology’s latest manifestation of “PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE”.
Don’t PLAY that game!
By: Cameron on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 1:16 pm
I second Cameron’s comment. Don’t fall for this passive-aggressive text bullshit. If he wants to “catch up,” he can use that phone to MAKE A PHONE CALL. Until then, he can suffer. You deserve better.
By: Stephen Rader on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 1:35 pm
I’d text back, “Who prevents you from calling me to catch up?” Not what but who. It will rattle him and you can play it off as a typo. It’s really passive-aggressive and he seems to be in to that so why not throw some at him.
Or you can be a grown up and do what Cameron suggests.
Or you can be a very assertive grown up and do what Aaron says.
Or ignore us and do whatever you want.
By: Sarah on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 1:46 pm
DIRK! Back away from the cell phone! Do NOT and I repeat do NOT even think about calling this dick tease back. So not worth your time or effort.
By: Lurker Girl on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 1:54 pm
I have to agree with Aaron….
Tell him to put up or shut up. It sounds like he is keeping you as a “spare” when other “plans” fall through.
You are worth more than being his “fallback” or “plan ‘B’”!!!
Let him know you are worth more than that and let him BEG you! Okay, I know your into the whole dom/sub thing, but maybe if you reversed your role this time, it may lead to something even better!
In any event, remember all of us care for you!! (And some more than others!)
By: Kevin on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 2:51 pm
Hmmmm…I’m torn. You can (a) text him back with: Did u 4get my#? or you can (b) text him back with: R U a crazy mofo or what?
I guess it’s your decision, but do tell what it is!
By: catrina on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 3:17 pm
Jeez, can’t you block his number?
I agree with Kevin. It sounds like you’re his fallback plan.
And frankly, unless you’re leaving parts of your “dates” out when you post about them, I don’t see the attraction in the first place. It seems like he has control over EVERYTHING that you two do and you’re just going along for the, in my opinion, “not-so-fun ride”.
You deserve better Dirk. Much better… ((HUGS))
By: tigeryogiji on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 3:40 pm
Can this man be married and infrequently “available”?
By: summer on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 4:25 pm
This is a joke, but I think you should add to either Aaron’s or Sarah’s suggestion “, bitch”
I actually think you should probably just leave it be right now…
By: karmicdragonfly on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 5:22 pm
Don’t call him. He sounds a whole lot like crap to me.
By: suzy on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 7:21 pm
The more you ignore the hotter you are. Men are strange little buggers but totally predictable.
By: randi on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 9:52 pm
I agree with randi, actually. Nothing gets a man interested like not acting interested.
That is, if you are interested in making him interested…and I’m not sure it’s a good interest for you to be interested in…
By: Mad Queen Bess on Tuesday, February 26, 2008
at 10:18 pm
Women do the same thing and it drives me up a slick wall.
By: Jer on Wednesday, February 27, 2008
at 7:39 am
Maybe its time you finally grew a pair and called CG and said “Hey, I’m not quite sure how you feel about me. Are you interested in dating, or just being friends?”
Although alarmingly direct and requiring you to take responsibility, it will clear up your questions and confusion. Give it a try!
Mark
By: Mark on Wednesday, February 27, 2008
at 11:06 am
I agree with Mark, at least then you would know.
By: Mike on Wednesday, February 27, 2008
at 12:26 pm
I think CG2 sounds like a better bet than CG1, IMO.
By: josh on Sunday, March 2, 2008
at 6:52 pm