Yesterday morning it was a balmy 52. By noon, we had tornado warnings and torrential downpours by 4.When I went to bed, the temp had dropped and we had an inch of snow (on top of ice). This morning it is 3 degrees with the wind chill making it -16. And as if that shit weren’t enough, my fucking sinuses hurt so bad I swear my eyes are going to explode every time I bend over. Suffice it to say, I do not have what it takes to serve up much more than some snippety stuff today…

~ The Grammy Nominations. Amy Winehouse. 6 Nominations. Seriously? Can you say “over-rated”? I think the judges need to get their asses to rehab if they think she’s got talent. Of course, I have to admit that judging from this pic, she has winner written all over her. As well as “Hello, Sailor” and “Blake” and…

~ While I’m on the subject of music, for weeks there was this song playing on the muzak at work that I had stuck in my head. So a couple of weeks ago, Carly hears me singing along and says her kids have that on their i-Pod…blah blah blah. Long story short she finds out the name of it and I buy the fucking cd single from Amazon (because I can just tell this is a one hit wonder at best). Okay, so I’m at home last week singing my ass off in the living room and all of a sudden it hit me that maybe I didn’t really know the lyrics because it kind of sounded like this guy was hooking up with someone older. Who he calls daddy. So I googled the lyrics:

I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you’d keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you

Yeah, definitely some creepy gay May-December thing. Then I get the second verse and I read the words that made my stomach sink:

I’m reachin’ out, reachin’ up, reachin over’
I feel a breeze cover me called Jehovah
And daddy I’m on my way…

Sweet Christmas — I’d been getting my groove on to Christian rap/rock! And it’s the Big Guy he’s referring to as daddy. “Made to Love” by TobeyMac (and may I just say that a more retarded rap name would be damn near fucking impossible to come up with) is a love song to God! I feel so dirty and used.

~ Adam Levine, lead singer for Maroon 5:

Mmmmmmmm — that’s just all kinds of yummy.

~ You know how celebrities always die in 3’s? Well, I’m totally confused by the recent spate of famous deaths: Brad Renfro, Suzanne Pleshette, Alan Melvoin, Lois Nettleton, Heath Ledger, and Christian Brando. Does anyone know if Brando completed a trio, was the second act, or started a new round? I need to start writing this shit down.

~ I did something to my fucking digital camera and unless the Best Buy guys can figure it out tomorrow, that means no pics for a while. I implore everyone to light a candle for me.

~ Finally, I know I need the fucking calories like I need a hole in the head, but has anyone had one of these?

Oh. Em. Gee. They are like chocolate covered sex. Only better, because they’ll set you back less than 2 bucks and they won’t promise to call after you’re done and then don’t, leaving you emotionally adrift, wondering what you did wrong this time. Available at your local Target. Get one.

That’s all I got.

Have a good one, folks.